“The selection of a Republican candidate for the presidency of this globalized and expansive empire is — and I mean this seriously — the greatest competition of idiocy and ignorance that has ever been.” -Fidel Castro Ladies and gentlemen we have now sunk to a new low. Fidel Castro has now called our presidential candidates [...]

I apologize. I am sorry to anyone who read my article in the magazine. I said that Newt Gingrich, Rick Santorum, and Jon Huntsman were sticking around for the sole purpose of garnering enough attention to get a show on Fox News. Frankly I think any of the three would be willing to take a [...]

 Frozen Purple Cow: Episode 5: Drink 5 Glasses a Day: Play Now | Play in Popup | Downloads 6

Good Evening, fellow Cow aficiondos! I know what you’re thinking- you’ve never heard that mantra about 5 glasses before. Well, I will explain. You eat three square meals a day which obviously includes a full glass of milk (we don’t discriminate- as long as you’re supporting our cows, we’re happy but we strongly urge 1% [...]

Yo. I’m so tired. These past few weeks have been really busy. When you’re not studying for heat & mass transfer prelims, you’re doing problem sets about a shell-and-8-tube pass heat exchanger forcing you to stay at Olin Library until 2 AM or doing the thermodynamics questions about fugacity which guest Professor Tester introduced two [...]

 Frozen Purple Cow- Episode 4: No one udder than T-Swizzle: Play Now | Play in Popup | Downloads 11

Yo,  it’s time once again to pull out the plaid from your closet and start mixing that Frozen Purple Cow of yours. This week, you can listen to an exciting list featuring many artists singing tunes from a gamut of 12 different genres. Impressive, huh? hahaha. Actually, I chose to dedicate my entire show to [...]

This Saturday night Risley Residential College will be host to one of the wildest dance parties of the year, the 16th annual Masquerave. For one night only, each of the rooms on this north campus dorm’s main floor will be transformed into other worldly creations, including a fractals room, astrology room, and a magical forest. [...]

The very first thing on Cornell’s famous “Big Red Ambition: 161 Things Every Cornellian Should Do” list is the following item: 1. Make the library into your bedroom and have sex in the stacks. I find it interesting that fucking in the library comes before spending a summer in Ithaca (#31) and taking Intro to [...]

For my “Desire” class this semester we’re reading The Symposium: Plato’s infamous play about the complex, sexual nature of learning. In the play, the leading philosophers of the time (Socrates, Aristophanes, Alcibiades, etc.) gather to praise Eros and discuss the true meaning of love. As each man delivers his speech, it becomes clear that the Greek method of [...]

Despite what we see on TV and in the movies, sex is often awkward, messy, and embarrassing. Real people don’t get the luxury of special lighting, scripts, re-takes, or a professional stylist to color-coordinate our bras and panties. Many times, sex in real-life is an improvisational, trial-and-error experiment. With so many variables to work with [...]