The Top 5 Reasons Why Ed Helms is the Perfect Choice for Convocation Speaker

Tuesday 18th, March 2014 / 21:48
in News

By: Morgan Miller

Today, the news broke that Ed Helms will be the Convocation speaker for the Class of 2014. The news was received enthusiastically by fans of The Office and with a little less joy from those who have not watched the famous comedy. Helm’s character on The Office, Andy Bernard, was a Cornell graduate with an overwhelming (read: obnoxious) pride for his alma mater. Whether or not you know who Andy Bernard is though, we think Ed Helms is a great choice, and here are the reasons why:

1.) He was in The Hangover so he understands what a typical weekend morning in Collegetown is like.

2.) He was in The Hangover II and The Hangover III so he knows exactly what 7pm on Slope day feels like too.

3.) He did voiceovers for The Lorax and Monsters vs. Aliens, so he’s bound to throw in some funny voice impressions during his speech. We are hoping for a Helms vs. Skorton showdown.

4.) Thanks to his wardrobe, he will blend right in with all the preps of Cornell. Argyle, hipster glasses – all that’s missing is a pair of Nantucket red pants and a ‘gonia fleece for the winter.

5.) He basically went here. Andy Bernard aka “the Nard-Dog” was in the a capella group Here Comes Treble (oddly similar to Cornell’s all female a capella group Nothing But Treble) AND he was in a frat, which makes him the fictional equivalent of basically half of this campus. 

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