Presented by Cornell University’s Skimm’bassador Erica Baevsky


WEATHER NEWS (9/15 & 9/17)

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOUR MOM ASKS HOW YOUR NEW ROOMMATE IS…
Not getting better. Last weekend, wildfires in northern California caused thousands of people to evacuate. On Monday, the situation got worse. Two separate fires completely destroyed hundreds of homes and displaced over 20,000 people, and one of the blazes is still barely contained. These fires are in large part thanks to a massive drought California’s been going through. Meanwhile, on Monday, southern Utah was hit by flash flooding caused by a thunderstorm. At least eight people were killed, and five others are missing.

 

WHAT PEOPLE ARE TALKING ABOUT…
On Wednesday night, a massive 8.3 magnitude earthquake struck off the coast of Chile. At least five people were killed and about a million people were evacuated from their homes in case of a tsunami. But Chile isn’t the only country on edge. Places as close as Peru and as far away as Hawaii and California are all on high alert for a tsunami.

 

SPORTS NEWS (9/14)

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU CAN’T TALK ABOUT NFL WEEK 1 ANYMORE…
Tennis, anyone? On Sunday, no. 1 ranked Novak Djokovic beat no. 2 ranked Roger Federer to win the US Open — and his 10th Grand Slam. Now, Federer has Serena’s shoulder to cry on. She was hoping to win the US Open, and with it a calendar-year Grand Slam. But then on Friday, she lost to unranked Italian player Roberta Vinci. Not the plan. In the finals last weekend, Vinci lost to another Italian: Flavia Pennetta. Pennetta celebrated her first Grand Slam win by announcing her surprise retirement. Because, veni, vidi, vici.

 

FINANCE NEWS (9/15)

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOUR FRIEND IN FINANCE IS LOOKING FOR A NEW JOB…
Maybe steer clear of Deutsche Bank. On Monday, Reuters reported that the German bank will not be needing a bigger boat, as it plans to fire about a quarter of the company’s employees. The news comes after a rough couple of months for the bank. First, it paid out billions in legal fees for things like allegedly manipulating interest rates. Then it was investigated for tax fraud. Then its co CEOs, Phil & Lil, resigned . Enter the new boss, who’s promised to cut costs. Which in this case looks like it means jobs. Deutsche Bank isn’t the only one on the struggle bus. Other European banks – like Italy’s UniCredit and Britain’s Barclays — have recently announced layoffs to cut costs.

 

COLLEGE NEWS (9/16)

WHAT PEOPLE ARE TALKING ABOUT…
Michael Deng. Two years ago, the 19-year-old Baruch College freshman died during a fraternity hazing ritual. After a lengthy investigation, officials are bringing charges against the 37 fraternity brothers involved.On Tuesday, five men were charged with things like criminal homicide and involuntary manslaughter. The others have pending charges. In 2013, Baruch’s Pi Delta Psi chapter allegedly blindfolded Deng and other pledges, made them wear backpacks full of sand, and had them run across a field while being shoved and hit by members. Deng sustained a serious head injury and was knocked unconscious. The members waited hours before bringing him to the hospital, where he eventually died. Now, some of the people involved could be going to prison for a long time.

 

TECH NEWS (9/16)

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOUR FRIEND SHOWS UP TO DINNER WITH A NEW HAIRCUT…
Lookin’ good. That’s what the auto industry said on Tuesday when Porsche unveiled its new luxury electric car concept. The “Mission E” will hit the road sometime in the next five years. It’s a sexy little four-seater that charges in less than 15 minutes. Aka faster than Elon Musk’s Tesla Model S. Shots, fired. Meanwhile, Amazon’s CEO Jeff Bezos is getting ready to take on Musk’s other company, SpaceX (which dreams of being the first to send tourists into orbit). On Tuesday, Bezos announced that his private space company, Blue Origin, will start building and launching rockets at Cape Canaveral. Aka where SpaceX launches rockets from. Galactic shots, fired.

 

SOCIAL MEDIA NEWS (9/16)

WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU SEE ANOTHER RANT ON FACEBOOK…
The button’s coming. And you’re gonna like to dislike it.

 

START-UP NEWS (9/17)

WHAT TO SAY WHEN THE FRIENDS YOU INTRODUCED MAKE PLANS WITHOUT YOU…
I see how it is. On Wednesday, two of Uber’s biggest rivals announced that they’re teaming up. Lyft (the one with the pink mustachioed cars) is getting together with Didi (the one that’s big in China) to let people use their apps interchangeably while traveling. So if you’re on business in Beijing, you’ll be able to use the Lyft app to hail a Didi car. The companies are also reportedly talking to ride-sharing services in India and Singapore to expand the partnership party. Uber need not RSVP. Burn, since Uber’s been trying to make it big in China…and has been eating Didi’s dust. At least there’s no love lost. Uber and Lyft have accused each other of sabotage in the past. Road, meet rage.

 

ENTERTAINMENT NEWS (9/15)

WHAT TO SAY TO YOUR FRIEND WHO CELEBRATED ROSH HASHANAH…
Happy New Year. Good news: Ahnold kept his promise — he came back.

 

MERGING COMPANIES (9/17)

WHAT TO SAY IF WAITING FOR THE FED’S DECISION DRIVES YOU TO DRINK…
It’s Miller time. That’s what Anheuser-Busch InBev said Wednesday when it saddled up to SABMiller with a takeover offer. These two companies own basically every brand in the beer aisle. So a merger would mean the creation of a global super-brewer. Think: tens of billions in annual revenue, and a market value of about $275 billion. But they may want to wait before officially tapping the keg. Regulators could look at the combined company and say, ‘it’s skunked.’ And the beer industry isn’t the only one in the takeover mood. On Wednesday night, Altice (European cable company) announced it’s buying Cablevision (American cable company). The deal will create the fourth-largest cable company in the US.

 

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