It’s been a full week, and thankfully my desired to taste wines have returned. (I know, you were all concerned). Maybe it’s the hype for homecoming or the fact that I haven’t been tasting the wines for about two weeks now, but as I sat down in this week’s classes I was definitely eager to begin. However, that excitement quickly vanished once I caught a whiff of what lay inside the glasses placed in front of me. As soon as the scent reached my nose, I turned to my friend and asked, “What is that smell and why am I supposed to drink this?”

65.media.tumblr.com
65.media.tumblr.com

For anyone planning to take wines–and for the sake of everyone’s future health and happiness–this type of wine is called concord. And yes, you should probably avoid it. Concord a type of red wine, but is not sweet whatsoever. My first impression was that they smelled of old cheese, mushrooms, and dirt. Appetizing, right? Needless to say I was not a fan, but I decided to take a taste anyway. Big mistake: it tastes cooked and musky. For some reason my teacher seemed to enjoy it, but it was definitely not for me. People around the class could be seen pouring it out into their cups and making facing like the baby below a.k.a #notcute. At any rate the wine tasted exactly like it smelled: nasty.

thefw.com
thefw.com

A piece of advice: Don’t taste anything that smells like old cheese, mushrooms, or dirt. In fact, If you aren’t adventurous or like to try new things that smell a little funky, this class might not be for you.

cdn4.teen.com
cdn4.teen.com

Aside from teaching me that wines could in fact be gross, this week’s classes focused a lot on the names of things, which was equally confusing. I learned that, when it comes to wine species and hybrids, sometimes their names just don’t make sense. For example: Our teacher introduced us to the term of a “foxy” aroma. Apparently, that’s what we call the flavor the we associate with grapes. A perfect example of this is the nasty grape cough medicine your mom used to shove down your throat in elementary school. Yes, I know you know exactly what I’m talking about. Me, however, just thought it was hilarious and super weird that we call wine “foxy.”

media.tenor.co
media.tenor.co

Another realization about names: Arandell is a name of a wine made here at Cornell! Does that mean we basically invented the movie Frozen? Maybe we should all get paid for creating the insane child film phenomenon.  #justsaying

images6.fanpop.com
images6.fanpop.com

I also learned that wine species make excellent names for pets. Cute names including Himrod, Noiret, Rotundifolia, and Canadice are just a few #namegoals you can expect to find.

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media.giphy.com

My point is that Wines and Vines isn’t just about tasting and experiencing wine: it’s also about all the weird, new things that come with it. Names of types of grapes, descriptor words, and learning that not all wine is good wine are just a few of the interesting, unexpected things you can look forward to when you take this class.