By now you’re probably bursting with excitement just over the thoughts of the approaching holiday season. Visions of stuffing, mashed potatoes, and sweet potatoes are consuming you, but so is the prospect of those the daunting conversations that will occur along that long, never-ending dining room table. Opinions will surely be thrown with the pass of the gravy and the accidental burning of the turkey– because of course it doesn’t taste right due to someone’s political opinion. The above situations are inevitable, so here are some tips for surviving the heated storm of familial clashes to come.
When Grandma asks about your relationship status
This one will surely kick off the evening of awkward responses. No matter what your actual situation is, you probably don’t want to go into much detail lest you incite the relentless script of follow-up questions she has prepared. It’s best to approach this with a line about how you and your friend group are bonding and have really been there for each other lately.
When the tension over how to cook the turkey ensues
It’s not even a question–everyone will think that they know the perfect way to cook the turkey. Try to avoid this ordeal all together by distracting people who aren’t the designated chefs from the kitchen otherwise your evening will start off with some very prominent tension in the room.
When somebody asks about your grades for the billionth time
Sure, you did fine, you probably passed, but also maybe you didn’t, and either way you just don’t want to talk about it during these precious days off. Try to re-route the conversation to extracurriculars so that you’re still talking about school, but nobody can chastise you for grades they don’t understand.
When someone brings up the election
Maybe when you see the fam again for the holidays in December this could have been avoided, but it’s only been two weeks. Somebody will mention Trump, complain about Hillary, and probably bring Obama into it too. Before you get into a screaming match about -isms and the future of our country, accidentally spill a glass of water or something else semi-catastrophic to erase their memories of the pending conversation.
When someone starts to criticize your generation
We get it. We’re millennials, we have technology, we live life differently than past generations. But that doesn’t mean we’re not hardworking and passionate people too! After the usual spiel about how brain-washed you supposedly are, try to hint at successful people your age or inspiring things that have happened. They probably still won’t believe you, but at least they’ll stop talking about it.
When someone asks you about money
You’re in college, Cornell is expensive, so chances are you’re probably broke. Just praise them for how thankful you are for your birthday presents and the occasional monetary rewards thrown your way, remind them of the jobs you’ve had, and try to move on. There’s really no fixing this one, it’s just a sad truth.
